Ingrid Poulson has been in the news a little lately. In 2003 her then husband, murdered her father and her two young children.
I listened to an interview with her on Radio National (‘Life Matters’ 7th August 2008) and she sounded really lovely, really well, really positive. Pretty amazing. And she has written a book ‘Rise’ and I am only too pleased to say so. I have no idea if it[s any good but I intend to take a look. In the interview I was struck by a number of things. She said that when her children were killed she was ‘un-mumed’. And she asks: what are we without a role? She asks: if we lose our role do we lose our identity? Good questions I think.
She also said something along the lines that at one point she had been telling her story so many times to so many groups that: ‘I was…it was becoming a little bit too much of my story…I’ve really chosen to move on…’ This also seems a great comment about how to deal with tragedy.
Of her current partner she said that perhaps the radio interviewer could ask him to help her with children. So even after her experience of 2003 she wants more children. She says: ‘…it’s something I wouldn’t mind doing.’ Pretty impressive I thought.
And from the Sydney Morning Herald (August 9th 2008) I read that her idea of resilience is based on four ideas:
– Resolve (Giving yourself permission to survive)
– Identity (acknowledging your wins and embracing flexibility)
– Support (You cant do it alone)
– And everyday (eat well, get some exercise and don’t watch too much TV)
I think my top four would be:
– A sense of belonging
– Identity and a clear sense of self
– Good relationships
– A sense of being in charge of yourself
I wonder if we really differ so much? All the very, very best to Ingrid. An inspiration truly.